> Abe & Esther Fly To Austrailia

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charles-smythe
#1 2013-11-01 14:03:55

Abe & Esther Fly To Austrailia

Abe & Esther Fly To Austrailia

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 50th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm afraid I have some very bad news... Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!"Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island.

An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our VISA and MasterCard bills yet?"

"No, sweetheart," she responds.

Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?"

"Oh, no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says.

"One last thing Esther. Did you remember to send the estimate check to the IRS this quarter?" he asks.

"Oh, forgive me, Abe," begged Esther. "I didn't send that one, either."

Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years.

Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?"

Abe answers, "They'll find us!"

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#2 2013-11-02 10:54:20

Re: Abe & Esther Fly To Austrailia

There was this rabbi in a small town, and he was really curious about
why so many people ate pork. He really wanted to try some, but there was
nowhere in town he could go and not be seen. One weekend, he made and
excuse and traveled to a distant town, went into a restaurant, and
ordered the first pork-containing item on the menu. While he's waiting
for his order to be prepared, the president of his congregation walks
in. He sees the rabbi and asks if he could join him for dinner, and the
rabbi has no choice but to agree.
  A while later, the waiter returns with the rabbi's meal. He takes the
cover off the platter, and there is a whole roast pig, with an apple in
its mouth.
  The congregation president is more than a little surprised. "Do you
believe this, Goldberg!?!!!!," explains the rabbi quickly. "I order a
baked apple and this is what they bring me."

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charles-smythe
#3 2013-11-02 16:33:00

Re: Abe & Esther Fly To Austrailia

...lol...

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